Parenting

Parenting

Role Model Crisis : Shallow Actors vs Real Achievers?

0
RoleModel

“Oh your daughter looks like Kangana!!”
“You son dances like Hritik!”

In social circle, you often find friends and relatives praising your kids by comparing with actors! We feel great and demand dance or singing song from toddlers! 🙁
 
If you praise someone by comparing their look to shallow-hollow Bollywood/Cricket public figures, note that you are suffering from cheap Bollywood/Cricket mania.
 
Can’t you see anything more than face value?
 
Bravery, audacity, intelligence, steadfastness – no value? How shallow!
 
If you compare your kids with stupid actors, you are villain for them as you limit their growth prospects. Don’t do these crimes!
 
One of the traits of देवत्व , as per Panini sutra (देव -> धातु दिवु is क्रीडाविजिगीषाव्यवहारद्युतिस्तुतिमोदमदस्वप्नकान्तिगतिषु),is स्तुति – The one who can praise others(humans, animals, nature) genuinely is DEVA (Genuine praise is very vital part of positive psychology! Those who have studied HR subjects, must be knowing this)
 
If you want to praise someone, tell him that his/her concentration is like Vivekanand, his/her love for nation is like Subhashchandra bose and his/her conviction is like Bhagatsingh!
 
Can’t we find better role model than cheap actors/cricketers for your kids???

Not only your child! Society’s child, Nation’s child!

0

laurel-851030_960_720

There is a fashion of putting new born child pics on social network. Parents call newborn as ‘My child’!

Dear parents,

Not only your child! Society’s child. Nation’s child. Mother Earth’s child! Don’t forget to instill National fervor, in between your selfish possessive love impulses for newborn. Train them to live selfless life.

Your friend,
Marut
=================
” Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.”

Kahlil Gibran

The Dark Side of the Modern Food

16996246_10156037308429762_1461116504279970802_n
If you can’t pronounce It, Do you still want to eat It? 😀
 
This is called कलियुगी माया! 🙂 Toxic influence of toxins!
 
The problem is, most processed foods have a laundry list of ingredients similar to that of a can of paint. It’s not as simple as adding a little sugar to canned bisque or lemon juice to a scone mix.
 
Take a look at the list of ingredients from the strawberry flavoring of a milkshake served at a zip-through restaurant:
Amyl acetate, amyl butyrate, amyl valerate, anethol, anisyl formate, benzyl acetate, benzyl isobutyrate, butyric acid, cinnamyl isobutyrate, cinnamylvalerate, cognac essential oil, diacetyl, dipropyl ketone, ethyl butyrate, ethyl cinnamate, ethyl heptanoate, ethyl lactate, ethyl methylphenylglycidate, ethyl Nitrate, ethyl propionate, ethyl valerbate, heliotropin, hydroxphrenyl-2butanone(10% solution to alcohol), a-ionone, isobutyl anthranilate, isobutyl butrate, lemon essential oil, maltol, 4-methylacetophenone, methyl anthranilate, methyl benzoate, methyl cinnamate, methyl heptine carbone, methyl naphthyl ketone, methyl slicylate, mint essential oil, neroli essential oil, nerolin, neryl isobulyrate, orris butter, phenethyl alcohol, sore rum ether, g-undecalctone, vanillin, and solvent[1]
 
[1] Schiosser E. :Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the All-American Meal, New
York, NY: Houghton Mifflin, 2001

Father, Oxytocin and Parenting

FatherParenting

Fathers are now industrial slaves. They are also entertainment and personal gratification slaves. Hardly get time to gel with kids. Forget about bonding. So oxytocin is always in scarce in blood.

For men, oxytocin function is less important, but it does have a role to play in moving sperm. It also appears to affect the production of testosterone in the testes.
A recent oxytocin study found that it is an important chemical messenger that controls some human behaviors and social interaction. It is oxytocin that triggers the bond between a mother and an infant, and it may also play a role in recognition, sexual arousal, trust and anxiety. Some research shows that the hormone may affect addiction and stress as well.

No wonder why so many teens now display anti-social behaviour. Autism or autism like symptoms are rampant.

First 5-7 years are very critical. If you want your child to grow as sensible citizen, shower your love, as much as possible.


Research


Intranasal oxytocin, but not vasopressin, augments neural responses to toddlers in human fathers

Fathers given boosts of the hormone oxytocin show increased activity in brain regions associated with reward and empathy when viewing photos of their toddlers, an Emory University study finds.

“Our findings add to the evidence that fathers, and not just mothers, undergo hormonal changes that are likely to facilitate increased empathy and motivation to care for their children,” says lead author James Rilling, an Emory anthropologist and director of the Laboratory for Darwinian Neuroscience. “They also suggest that oxytocin, known to play a role in social bonding, might someday be used to normalize deficits in paternal motivation, such as in men suffering from post-partum depression.”

The journal Hormones and Behavior published the results of the study, the first to look at the influence of both oxytocin and vasopressin — another hormone linked to social bonding — on brain function in human fathers.

A growing body of literature shows that paternal involvement plays a role in reducing child mortality and morbidity, and improving social, psychological and educational outcomes. But not every father takes a “hands-on” approach to caring for his children.

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0018506X16304457

Brain & Mind Development : Why Gadget-free childhood?

0

kids_and_smartphones-100672283-primary.idge

Mind is a process.मन or to think or ‘minding – the process of thinking’. A Process that keeps Brain on the top busy, generating billions and more currents daily. A process can never be silent. A process will always be tense; a process means a turmoil. And mind is always moving from the past to the future. The past goes on being a burden on it, so it has to move into the future. This constant movement creates another tension within you. If you become too much conscious about it, you may go mad. Society trains your capacity into an actuality, it gives you a mind. That is why a Hindu has a certain mind and a Mohammedan has a different mind. Both are men, but their minds are different. A Christian has a different mind… These minds are different because different societies have cultivated them with different purposes, different goals. And so Child development is very important Nation building activity.

There is another process that goes on in heart. It is process of bliss. You can experience it only when you can slow down process of minding. Let Bliss work at higher priority than mind and feel the difference. If you read seer-scientist Patanjali’s Yoga, he begins with the same i.e. cessation of mind. Get the hint and work upon it.

Babies’ brains need stimulation to develop their full potential. Their best learning is from being highly attuned to human stimuli—interacting with your face, voice, and touch. Singing, talking, and reading to babies are all ideal ways of stimulating their senses.

Human stimuli without humans is not possible.

And what do parents and teachers do?

1) Video games, mobiles, tablets, laptops and TV consumes most of the productive time
2) Schools introduce digital mediums for teaching

Period of brain development is limited. Senses develop within first 10-12 years. Do not limit your kid’s potential. Keep them away from media and digital mediums. Educate their school management about neuroscience and ask them to get rid of tablet teaching asap. It is foolish technological fad, that’s it. No real long term benefits. Do not surrender to system for the better future of your kids and their society in future. 🙂 Take care.

Parents’ teen age secures child’s future

0

TeenAge

Old note on parenting for teen age:

Right Age, Right Actions : No? Yes to Cervical cancer

This life is continuous uninterrupted journey. All our actions are recorded secretly (चित्रगुप्त या गुप्त चित्र) and passed on to next generation! Only selfish generation with think for self and never care about the future generations. Nothing but civilization blunder & societal suicide.

We are nothing but a link between past and future! Perform your duty well. Nurture your kids well so that they too can play their role efficiently.

Most important section of childhood is teen-age. Time when a kid is mature enough to know many things, developing layer upon layer on Ego in absence of right life-oriented education and a guide. This will turn them into yet another adult ready to be slave of master-slave system prevailing in the world.

We must act to break this chain. Read this research to realize importance of teen-parenting, role of resident Guru-centered schooling during teen age and


Research


Adolescence and the next generation

Adolescent growth and social development shape the early development of offspring from preconception through to the post-partum period through distinct processes in males and females. At a time of great change in the forces shaping adolescence, including the timing of parenthood, investments in today’s adolescents, the largest cohort in human history, will yield great dividends for future generations.

https://media.nature.com/lw926/nature-assets/nature/journal/v554/n7693/images/nature25759-f1.jpg
https://media.nature.com/lw926/nature-assets/nature/journal/v554/n7693/images/nature25759-f1.jpg

Puberty marks a transition to adolescence and a life phase during which girls and boys acquire resources that are essential for becoming parents of the next generation. It also marks the beginning of reproductive life with a transition to functional gamete production. The preconceptional phase (that is, adolescence) varies markedly in length carrying implications for the acquisition of the social, financial and educational assets and nutritional, health and interpersonal risks that underlie intergenerational processes. The three months before conception is a time of male and female gamete maturation when parental exposures, including nutrition, obesity, substance use, stress, endocrine disruptors and physical activity may influence gamete structure and function. Periconception includes fertilization of the maternal and paternal gametes as well as the zygote and embryonic phases that are sensitive to the maternal nutritional and hormonal environment. There continue to be direct maternal effects antenatally mediated through the in utero environment and postnatally through nutrition (for example, breastfeeding) and the maternal–infant relationship. Direct paternal influences grow in the postnatal phase through the paternal–infant relationship and potentially through risk exposures, such as paternal tobacco use. Maternal and paternal health, behaviour as well as social and economic circumstances continue to have an indirect effect on offspring development in both antenatal and postnatal phases.

https://www.nature.com/articles/nature25759

 

3 Studies : How would-be father’s life routine affect future generations

Father

Of course, focus would be on pregnant mother for 9+ months. Her role and patience is supreme. No doubt about it. But that does not mean we ignore fatherly duties!

Pregnancy does not start when a female realizes conceived baby.It starts much before when very first thought of having kids arises in couples’ mind!

Father plays critical role before pregnancy. His entire life-routine play a significant role in passing legacy to immediate offspring and all future offspring.

Documenting three studies discussing role of father.

Suggestions:

  • Don’t take unnecessary office stress if you are planning to conceive in next 9-12 months
  • No family issues for 9-12 months before planning
  • Control on senses. No indulgence of entertainment, TV, movies etc for 12 months before child planning
  • Simple home-cooked food. Regular food timing
  • Regular exercise, walking and running
  • Surya Namaskara

Research


Increased stress on fathers leads to brain development changes in offspring

New research in mice has found that a father’s stress affects the brain development of his offspring. This stress changes the father’s sperm, which can then alter the brain development of the child. This new research provides a much better understanding of the key role that fathers play in the brain development of offspring.

https://phys.org/news/2018-02-stress-fathers-brain-offspring.html

Stressed mouse dads give their offspring high blood sugar

Paternal Psychological Stress Reprograms Hepatic Gluconeogenesis in Offspring

Both epidemiologic and experimental animal studies demonstrate that chronic psychological stress exerts adverse effects on the initiation and/or progression of many diseases. However, intergenerational effects of this environmental information remains poorly understood. Here, using a C57BL/6 mouse model of restraint stress, we show that offspring of stressed fathers exhibit hyperglycemia due to enhanced hepatic gluconeogenesis and elevated expression of PEPCK. Mechanistically, we identify an epigenetic alteration at the promoter region of the Sfmbt2 gene, a maternally imprinted polycomb gene, leading to a downregulation of intronic microRNA-466b-3p, which post-transcriptionally inhibits PEPCK expression. Importantly, hyperglycemia in F1 mice is reversed by RU486 treatment in fathers, and dexamethasone administration in F0 mice phenocopies the roles of restraint stress. Thus, we provide evidence showing the effects of paternal psychological stress on the regulation of glucose metabolism in offspring, which may have profound implications for our understanding of health and disease risk inherited from fathers

http://www.cell.com/cell-metabolism/fulltext/S1550-4131(16)30006-7?_returnURL=https%3A%2F%2Flinkinghub.elsevier.com%2Fretrieve%2Fpii%2FS1550413116300067%3Fshowall%3Dtrue

The father effect

Discovery of how environmental memories may be transmitted from a man to his grandchildren

If you have diabetes, or cancer or even heart problems, maybe you should blame it on your dad’s behaviour or environment. Or even your grandfather’s. That’s because, in recent years, scientists have shown that, before his offspring are even conceived, a father’s life experiences involving food, drugs, exposure to toxic products and even stress can affect the development and health not only of his children, but even of his grandchildren.

But, despite a decade of work in the area, scientists haven’t been able to understand much about how this transmission of environmental memories over several generations takes place. McGill researchers and their Swiss collaborators think that they have now found a key part of the molecular puzzle. They have discovered that proteins known as histones, which have attracted relatively little attention until now, may play a crucial role in the process.

http://www.mcgill.ca/newsroom/channels/news/father-effect-255992

 

Making of Zombies : Why media spreads objectification of woman?

2

Objectification

He or she is not human who lacks empathy and community sentiments. Living life of each other is the Vedic principle. We see life as universal sacrifice, helping others. Our motto is “इदं न मम” (This is not mine. This life, this action. Nothing is mine! Nothing is for me! My life is for the world! Rest of the universe!)

This way of life, backed and relied upon Vedic dharmic principles is dangerous for power centers of the world. When world runs like this, they cannot rule the world forever!

So, what is the weapon?

  1. Modern media as mediums
  2. To spread the objectification of gender

Result?

  • Making of zombie who lives life for extremely narrow-minded self-interest and lacks empathy towards the rest.

One one hand, media sells sex to young girls, making them obsessed of self, body and external appearance. Spreading a meme that, it is perfectly ok to be object in front of rest.

On the other hand, media sell extreme objectification of females. This turns most media content recipients into zombies who lack empathy! The collective feeling! For them, opposite gender is mere object to be consumed!

Please read old note on same topic:

Hyper-sexual Media and Child Development

New research shows that in hyper sexulized world, we are being hardwired to lose empathy networks in brain!


Research


Reduced empathic responses for sexually objectified women: An fMRI investigation

Sexual objectification is a widespread phenomenon characterized by a focus on the individual’s physical appearance over his/her mental state. This has been associated with negative social consequences, as objectified individuals are judged to be less human, competent, and moral. Moreover, behavioral responses toward the person change as a function of the degree of the perceived sexual objectification. In the present study, we investigated how behavioral and neural representations of other social pain are modulated by the degree of sexual objectification of the target. Using a within-subject fMRI design, we found reduced empathic feelings for positive (but not negative) emotions toward sexually objectified women as compared to non-objectified (personalized) women when witnessing their participation to a ball-tossing game. At the brain level, empathy for social exclusion of personalized women recruited areas coding the affective component of pain (i.e., anterior insula and cingulate cortex), the somatosensory components of pain (i.e., posterior insula and secondary somatosensory cortex) together with the mentalizing network (i.e., middle frontal cortex) to a greater extent than for the sexually objectified women. This diminished empathy is discussed in light of the gender-based violence that is afflicting the modern society.

http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0010945217304045?via%3Dihub


Stop acting like a consumption machines. Teach this bloody Ad industry tight slap lesson. Boycott their medium for 5 years. You, you family, your friends – complete boycott of all TV channels showing Ads with objectification of Mahila.

Can you do it in National interest? I hear lot of noise like ‘Nation First’. Here is simple step to contribute your efforts without hampering daily life routine.

 

 

Seeds of corrupt society in ignored parenting

0

21st-century-orphans

Ignore giving moral and strength inducing education to 8 year old and the Nation pays for your stupid mistake for next 60 years till your beloved son lives.

Lack of morals and ethics -> Cunning and opportunistic youth -> Coward and delusional Adult

Destroy growth of ब्रह्मचर्य (Youth below 25) -> गृहस्थी will collapse and struggle to sustain life and in that struggle, they will become corrupt and when same गृहस्थी would turn वानप्रस्थी, he is already tired so he will remain passive वानप्रस्थी.

If all retired citizens, 60+ of age, meet and take up mission against Govt. There is nothing to lose but surely many things to win!

One must understand his/her duty in वानप्रस्थ आश्रम.

Alas! Our old age guys are busy in time pass, recalling their golden time, old time movies and all… or they are too weak and powerlees in old age homes…or they have not yet retired and harassing their children in their businesses…

Cook for Kids, cook for God : Most Sacred Duty

0

CookForKids

One friend said in private message after reading this post(https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10153519016694762):

“you said right that fast food is dangerous but do we really have alternative? Kids go to school and learn new food habits. We simply cannot control it.”

—————————

Well then what we parents are for? If schools spoil the habits, take actions. Be part of parenting fraternity. Awake fellow parents. Take seminars on fast food in schools. Awake fellow students of your kids. There is no free lunch. You have to pay the price for your lethargy being a parent. Don’t be so helpless. If kid is picking bad habits from some source, work on it. That is your duty as a parents.

And about alternative, we have many homemade food to replace filthy fast food. Yes, you will have to spend some time in kitchen for it. Do it. Sacrifice your cricket match, movie and weekend getaway and spend time in kitchen. Best if you can involve kids.

For example: Sukhadi. It is best alternative for both chocolates and biscuits. Rich in nutrients and delicious! Enough for growing kids never ending energy needs.

Our cultural diversity is rich enough for finding alternatives. Put some efforts. Be an active parent. (I am also trying to be one).

If there is a will, there is a way. Experiment instead surrendering to the environment. (Y)

Popular Posts

Who is Chitragupta?

Yoga and Food

My Favorites

We’re sending our kids to school too young

We now have hyper Macaulay education system. Start torture as early as possible. As early as age 2 and lo! The kid is in...